A girl with God and a lot of yeses in the middle

Tuesday, August 16, 2011


What is the definition of home?  I'm not actually sure.  I used to think it was the house my parents live in, but then I never really lived there.  They built the house they live in my senior year of high school, and we moved into it 1 month before I went to college.  I also really thought it was Waco, but to be honest Waco feels a million miles away right now.

It's so interesting for me to think of home these days.  I find myself still missing friends and family greatly, but after a week away or a weekend away all I want to do is go home.  I want to go to my big concrete house, sleep under my mosquito net, and wait for the sun to wake me up around 5:45 (although I've perfected the art of going back to sleep).  I want to wake up on a Saturday morning and make my made from scratch breakfast.  I want to do crazy work out videos with 4 of the girls on my team.  I want to climb through the jungle of our courtyard to turn the generator on.  I want to be back home.  Home is my yellow house that I share with 5 other people.  Home is this island.

Home is unleashing in me a creativity I never knew was within me.  Monday of last week I got very sick on a trip home from port-au-prince.  I'll spare the details, but it was by far my worst day in Haiti.  While I was laying in bed Monday afternoon a culinary idea popped into my mind.  I was craving spaghetti & meatballs, but we haven't quite figured out how to do meat here, so on Saturday I made beanballs.  Essentially the same components minus meat plus black beans.  Here you improvise and you experiment.  Home is stretching me to be beyond what I thought I could be.

Home is shaping me and molding me.  Home is making me a stronger and weaker woman at the exact same time.  I've learned so much, and learned that what I know is even less.  I have planted my heart in the soil here and though it's still just a seed under the earth, I feel it about to breakthrough the top soil.  Thank you Haiti.  Thank you for welcoming me and letting me plant myself.  May I grow well in your soil.  My I sprout when it is time and my I bloom with the Glory of God.

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